OHSU

I am interviewing at OHSU today. Its gorgeous outside, no Portland rain and I am hopeful. Thank you for your prayers.

Rejections and Questions...

If I can stop one heart from breaking,
I shall not live in vain:
If I can ease one life the aching,
Or cool one pain,
Or help one fainting robin
Unto his nest again,
I shall not live in vain.
- Emily Dickinson -


I received a rejection email from Creighton today. Super disappointing. As time has gone on, it was a school I was really looking forward to having a chance at attending. They place a big emphasis on a relationship with God as part of your medical education and have a heart for service. I love the above poem by Emily Dickinson. For me it encompasses seeking to live a life of significance while understand that often the smallest things we do in the service of others are significant. I have been wondering lately if my quest to become a doctor is in search of significance or actual calling. I have always wanted to be in a caring oriented profession and the concept of enabling people to live healthy full lives to me mirrored what Jesus did in physically healing so that they could be healed emotionally, mentally or spiritually etc and go on whatever journey lay ahead for them. At any rate there are lots of factors into why I have sought medical school - but I wonder more and more often am I doing it for me? For the honor and prestige? For the significance? Is it really the place God is calling me? A wise man once told me that being a doctor was a set of skills he used in the service of God, but his calling was to be a husband to his wife, a father to his children and a man of God within the church.

One of the reasons I felt the freedom to move back to Oregon was I began to realize that God's ultimate will for my life was to love him, to be in relationship with him and to love other people. The rest are details he will work out in me and through me along the way. That's easier said than done. I still long for a niche or a place to call my own. And who knows. Perhaps God will open doors in another direction or at another medical school.

Today holds elements of disappointment, but there are still elements of Joy. Its beautifully sunny outside. My sister and best friend is sitting next to me. I had dinner with my family yesterday and almost finished an entire books and three of my best friends in the entire world are coming to visit tomorrow.

The words of lamentation have continually reverberated with my lately - in relation to Lent, to disappointing situations and to events in my life where God has turned the ugly and hurtful to beauty and healing ( as he did in Esther) -

You give...
BEAUTY for ASHES
STRENGTH for FEAR
GLADNESS for MOURNING
PEACE for DESPAIR.

May your days hold both rain and sunshine so you can see the beauty in each...

Love to all of you

Sunny Saturdays

Portland comes alive on a sunny afternoon. Today the city felt really vibrant. Everyone was out and about walking their dogs, visiting and eating. Rach and I went and had yummy breakfast with Erica at a little diner that has been in Portland since the 1940's. After we said good bye to Erica at the airport we hit the library briefly then Rach left for Yoga and I met lena to go the Saturday market.

For those of you who have never been to the Portland Saturday Market it is a sight worth seeing. Tons of people teemed in and out of multiple booths of anything and everything you can sell. Every other person has a dog with them and there is so much yummy food the air is saturated with tantilizing smells. All of this is set along Portland's gorgeous waterfront park where there are numerous bands and musicians playing and children are romping around in the fountains. Lena and I tried really yummy Perogies, a Polish kind of potato dumpling filled with cheese. It was fantastic. We sat on a bench and visited while we ate and watching the people wander through the park. I really wanted to throw myself down on the grass with a good book and a blanket as many others were already doing. We also discovered several independent jewelry makers whose wares were just gorgeous. When I have money I will be coming back for sure.

Later we realized we hadn't put enough money in the parking meter and we raced back to check it, thankfully no ticket. What we did discover was an amazing marimba player ( looks like a wooden xylephone?) who plays in front of our house in the park frequently. I can't wait to open the window of our new apartment nice and wide and listen as the melody floats up. The artist website is www.michaelcharleysmith.com. Check him out, he was very talented.

Currently sitting in Powell's, one of my very favorite haunts of all time. I could be in here forever. Attempted to work somewhat on applications. Lena is diligently working on her application for Uganda across from me.

Off to meet Rachael for dinner.

Two days ( well three technically but I don't count the day of) until I see my clark street girls. Seriously cannot express the excitement.

Love to each of you.

Jobs, Friends and Praise

I will bless the Lord at all times: his praise shall continually be in my mouth.
(Psalm 34:1)



Praise God from whom all blessings flow, praise him all creatures here below. Praise him above ye heavenly host, praise father son and holy ghost.

I love the doxology!

This week has been one of great praise.

Erica has been here and her presence is fantastic.

Rachael got a JOB!!! Hoooray. She will be doing cooking/food prep at a nice restraunt in the Pearl district.

I have a job interview today, completed a job test this week, submitted an application through a friend that had possibility and have a job lunch/interview next week. I am hopeful and grateful!

We had a really yummy dinner out with Lenna. She is kinda fantastic!

And next week my Clark street girls are here!


I am currently le lurrving my life.

Thank you Jesus.